Please try and listen, and please understand.
I want to tell you how I feel but I don't know if I can.
You told me so many things that I never knew.
And everything you said drew me closer to you.
I care about you strongly and I hope you know.
No matter how hard stuff gets I'll never let you go.
I'm here to help you anytime anyday.
I'm always willing to listen
Forever and always.

slowly, everything is falling apart. Maybe that confrontation was not necessary. i'm losing you too. ohh fuck, i've tendencies to say things which are not neccesary. whatever it is, i hope one day when i cut myself again, subconciously i'll cut myself too deep and die. i'm just 15 and i'm already like that. i haven't any idea why i've become so screwed constantly thinking of death/ways to end my life. it's so uncalled for. i wished that THIS person would talk to me again, you used to be quite close and we would talk about nonsense. but ever since i started liking THAT person i've screwed everything up. you know, i give up so much for THAT person. but i'd give up more to be what we were like last year. THIS person doesnt talk to me, she calls me a daughternovabitch. ok it's fine with me cos i dont give that much a fuck to name calling and sorts. wait, i do i think i do. but i'm really sorry for all i've caused and if one day we could be friends again tell me, i'll do anything to be there for you.

have you ever wondered why you cant be what everyone wants you to be?
have you ever wondered why is it always your fault?
have you ever wondered why you can never be what you want to be?

i've always thought about it. i've realized one thing. i'm just not cut out to be in this world. i cant handle the stress i cant take the pressure; i figured i should do the right thing and not carry on to destroy the world.